10 Tips for getting over a break up

4_29_18I am currently coping with a break up and thought that I’d share a few tips that I’ve come across to help myself as well as anyone else who may be trying to overcome heartbreak.

1. Cut off all communication. This one is extremely hard for me as we’ve had this ongoing on again, off again relationship for almost 8 years. More on than off. This time it’s really over,  and although I know that he is not the right man for me  It’s extremely hard to not call, text, or accept communication from him. In the past we’ve never cut off communication and each time it led to some type of argument, or sympathy that would lead us to getting back together.. even though we hadn’t worked through our issues. During my research I’ve learned that this one tip is crucial when it comes to getting over your ex.

2. CRY. It’s ok to have a pity party after the break up. You have to get all of those emotions out in order to gain clarity so, that you can rid yourself of those feelings and focus on YOU and moving on with your life. Oprah3. Get Emotional Support. I don’t like sharing details of my personal life with anyone however, I have learned that it’s actually healthy to speak with someone whether it be a close friend, family member, or counselor to talk it out. A listening ear, empathy, and another perspective can help you see just why you need to get over the relationship.

4. Find Healthy Distractions. I’ve personally taken this time to figure out how to become a better me. I’ve focused my energy on exercising, reading, re-vamping my look, and getting out being social… ALONE.

Angela B Mascara5. Be Single. Use this time to 100% be selfish and all about you. This is the time to get dolled up and FLIRT your lil life away. This is a great harmless confidence booster!

6. Resist the urge to check up on your ex. This means no stalking their Social Media, doing Drive By’s or Pop Ups, and definitely no hanging out with their friends. I know that it seems crazy to cut off the friends especially when they may be really good friends to you but, reality is.. you need to go on a break with them also, to prevent having to continuously talk about your ex or potentially running into them right now while you’re trying to heal.

7. Remove all reminders. I’m sorry girl.. but, how can you move on when their pictures and belongings are all around you? You have to delete the pics or box them up and send them their belongings as it will only hurt to keep seeing them all of the time.

8. DO NOT COMMIT TO BEING FRIENDS RIGHT NOW. I’m not saying that you can’t be friends but, you don’t want things to be weird and akward. You need time to get them out of your system romantically before you can establish a healthy, genuine friendship with them.

9. Do not blame yourself. You were not in the relationship alone and you’re both broken up. You can’t beat yourself up wondering what if. Reality.. It wasn’t meant to be. #theirloss

10. If you’re deciding to date and move on… Take things very slow. Remember, that you’ve just gotten out of a relationship and need time to truly get over your ex. You want to be mentally ready before potentially getting into a new relationship too soon. Take your time, casually date, and simply enjoy yourself while you evaluate your potential suitors to determine if you’re ready to be in a serious relationship versus just playing the field.

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Cheers to getting our grooves back!

XOXOX Blog Siggy

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4 Simple ways to start your self love journey

4_8_18 Blog Post

Self -Love is Absolutely NOT Selfish! I began my self love journey last year when I turned 40. I’ve learned that it is one of the ultimate keys to Happiness. There are several scientific backed studies that supports the importance of why you should love yourself. Self- Love and Acceptance will give you mental clarity, help you to stop procrastinating, lower your risk for developing depression and/or anxiety and gives you greater satisfaction with your life.

4 Simple Ways that have helped me and can potentially help you to get started on your Personal Journey are…

  1. A Self-Love/Gratitude Journal. I enjoy reflecting and documenting all of the good things that I experience daily.
  2. Daily Positive Affirmations. After leaving my Emotionally/Verbally abusive Husband several years ago. I had NO self-esteem. I needed confidence and had to learn to love myself again. I started by reading really powerful books, speaking with a Therapist who taught me all about Mantras and Positive Affirmations. I reclaimed my confidence by learning to appreciate myself. I used Positive Self-Talk and Affirmations. Everyday for the last 10 years and to this day I still look in the mirror and repeat.. I am Strong, I am Beautiful, I am Confident, I Love and Appreciate ME, I am Loving and Kind, I am Good Enough, and I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

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3. Schedule Dates with Yourself. Our lives can get pretty hectic sometimes hell, slightly overwhelming. It’s ok to take out your Planner and schedule some alone time. I like to treat myself at least twice a month to some much needed “ME TIME”. This is time in which I like to treat myself to a day out. I like to go Shopping, have Brunch, Get Pampered, and Site See.

4. Meditation. This is my all time favorite. I meditate twice a day. I wake up 20-30 minutes early and listen to the (Headspace) app on my phone. I repeat this again before bed and it feels absolutely amazing to get positive vibes going before starting and ending my day.

There are several things that you can do to start loving on you! These are a few ways that I show my self Love on the regular.

My Inspiration started a few years ago when I read this article: What Self-Love Means: 20+ Ways to Be Good to Yourself by Banu Sekendur (Tiny Buddha) (click here) to read. This article as well as several others in addition to a few really great books helped me to learn what Self – Love and Acceptance is and how to positively find happiness. I highly encourage you to learn more, do what you love, and take time out to find Joy and Happiness. Life is too short.. it time to start Living and Loving You!

Feel free to share some of the ways that you exercise Self-Love in the Comments.

XOXOX Blog Siggy